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True Blood: An Orgy For Your Eyes

June 21, 2010

Woodard, Alejandro, Ellis & Wesley

Last night’s True Blood, while not the glutton-fest of the season premiere, still was an over-indulgent orgy for our eyes. Not the kind of orgy typically seen on True Blood, but an orgy nonetheless. We start the hour with Bill biting the ear off a werewolf and end it with Sookie shooting… someone. I’m assuming the wolf, not Eric. In between we meet the about a thousand new characters (many of whom are gay – is True Blood trying to overtake Brothers and Sisters as the gayest show on TV?). It’s as if they want to get all of the introductions out of the way so we can go ahead and dive head first into the good stuff.

A brief introduction:

The King of Mississippi, Russell Edgington (Denis O’Hare): He looks like a character right out of  a dining room mural, as he rode up on his horse, in his long red hunting coat. He sent the werewolves to kidnap Bill and plans to hold him captive until Bill can convince Queen Sophie-Anne to marry Russell. I wonder how Talbot will feel about this…

Talbot (Theo ALexander): Russell’s kept man who could easily fit in on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy if it were still on the air. Or, at least a combination of HGTV’s Design Star and Top Chef. With the sterling silver door he added to Bill’s bedroom and the cruelty-free chilled, carbonated blood, warm blood bisque infused with rose petals and blood gelato her served for dinner. I can’t help but quote: “Note the citrusy finish: This one ate only tangerines for weeks” and ”Excuse me, gentlemen. I need to drain the second course… Carlo, bring me that Thai boy.” I would kill to write for this show.

Jesus (Kevin Alejandro): Add Alejandro to the list of Hot Male Nurses (which includes Nurse Jackie‘s Mo-Mo and Precious‘ Whatever They Named Lenny Kravitz’ character). We didn’t learn a lot about him last night, but who cares? We know he takes care of Lafayette’s mother and that Lafayette is interested. That’s good enough for now.

Ruby Jean (Alfre Woodard): Woodard lifts any and everything she is in and True Blood is no exception. While already one of my favorite shows, Woodard’s Ruby Jean owned the screen for the less than 2 minutes of screen time she got last night. And, apparently she’s going to be this season’s most quotable character: after Jesus said he thought her son had passed away, she came back with, “He did. God killed him cause he a faggot. But he keep comin’ back.” And then when she introduced Tara and Lafayette to Jesus – who she called Jesus, not Jesus – she said, “‘This is Jesus. He’s a Mexican. But he ain’t rape me yet.” Go ahead and add Woodard’s name to your Emmy ballot for next year for Guest Performance.

Franklin Mott (James Frain): Tara is not a vampire fan, but this vampire detective clearly is interested in her. After meeting her at Merlott’s, he followed her outside and held two rednecks as she took out her frustrations on them after seeing them urinate on the spot where Eggs had died and calling him names that I won’t type into this paragraph. While Tara was going through the stages of grief, Mott was baring his fangs… metaphorically getting a hard-on watching Tara. I love how these vampires work.

There were more, but these were the ones I got excited about… I am also slightly intrigued by Sam’s mother, Melinda Mickens, and how their whole shapeshifting storyline will evolve. Again, I blinked and the hour was gone. I cannot wait for next week’s episode.

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